


.definition

by Zaiya (iqoras)



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Other, Reader Insert, Sauron - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-02
Packaged: 2018-04-09 03:40:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4332462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iqoras/pseuds/Zaiya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The light just wasn’t in reach, it hadn’t been for a long time and as much as you don’t want to think of the truth you know that he can’t be saved.</p>
            </blockquote>





	.definition

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Wattpad.

“The enemy.”

Silence.

“The deceiver.”

More. Shadows fell across faces and if you hadn’t known better you would have thought him ashamed.

“The necromancer.” 

The effect was the same, though not as severe. Shame, almost, but his chin also jutted into the air, pride not allowing him or you to succumb. Royal, respectable, a king even in the worst of times. You join the silence, not rattling off the other few titles you had heard. Instead you glared, eyes dark and accusing, and oh God a part of you wanted to run run run away, foolish girl, why were you still here, you knew there was no hope, there couldn’t be, he had been lost for too long—

“You left out the most important title.” His voice is dark and deep and indescribable, leaves a chill in your spine and a fire in your heart and you’re so afraid but also so stubborn, so fucking stubborn, because you had known him before this, had seen him before he fell, knew that this evil, this personification, this guard couldn’t be all that there was.

“Lord of Mordor,” you say, and the fear is gone and your voice is hard and angry and bitter, and the title is spat like an insult. This particular title reminds you of all that he has done and how disappointed you have been for so long and how your heart used to ache over what had become of him. You suddenly feel like erasing his existence, liking crushing him and everything he now stands for. But you don’t, you can’t, you’re too weak, always have been when it comes to him, and instead your breath comes out in a ragged sigh.

It is that, more than anything else, that brings a reaction from him. The initial shame is gone but so is the idiotic pride, that bitter pride, that he had been feigning before. His expression is almost broken, guarded, and you knew no one else but you had ever seen him look this way, not in any of his forms or through any of his lies because he wouldn’t let anyone see him this way. He wouldn’t even let you, not before, and you don’t know why he is now.

He had been lost so long, you know, falling forever in a void, the light that had once been in reach now too far for even you to see. But that can’t be the end of things, it can’t, because he was once so innocent, so determined, not nearly as touched by all this evil and regret and hatred.

“Sauron.” You say the name quietly, eyes furrowed and looking upon him. He frowns, not meeting your gaze until you speak again. “That was never your true name. It was never you. Sauron is a monster.”

And oh, does he look so broken, so fragile, so unlike the beast he often was, that had you terrified mere minutes ago—

“You are Mairon, the admirable. Sauron means abhorred and that is truly fitting for what you made of yourself. But before that, underneath it, you are still Mairon. My lost, led astray, stupidly admirable love.”

You want to tell him to stop running but you know for certain that after this night, despite what may happen and that you were still hopelessly in love with him, always would be, and you knew that he loved you, too, but the light just wasn’t in reach, it hadn’t been for a long time and as much as you don’t want to think of the truth you know that he can’t be saved.

“I have only ever been sorry for one thing,” he says and your throat tightens. “I have always regretted leaving you behind. Everything could have been different.”

“But you did leave.”

“Yes.”

“And things can’t be changed now.”

. . .

“Yes.”


End file.
